When these happen, as a child, you feel unsafe and you try to find other ways to COPE and feel safe
If they always yelled at you when you didn't do something right, you assume the way to stay safe is to keep doing anything you can to please people so they won't shout at you
If you were always dismissed whenever you expressed your emotions, you assume the way to stay safe is to bottle up all your emotions
If one of your parents was physically absent, you assume the way to stay safe is to do everything possible to make sure someone else doesn't leave again.
These habits become like beliefs, and you start to think they're the only way to be safe.
Here's the tricky part...
Most times, the things you do as a kid to feel safe turn into habits you keep even as you grow up.
So, even as an adult, when you notice even a tiny hint that a similar problem might happen (like a late text reply, loud noises, or if your partner shows little sign of disinterest,...)
You automatically fall back into those old coping patterns without even realizing it..
This doesn't mean you're broken!
It just means your inner child needs some healing.
And the good news is, that healing is possible.
By understanding your past and why you react in certain ways, you can start to create healthier patterns for yourself and your relationships
How do you go about that?
Do you feel like you always sacrifice yourself for others only for them to end up hurting you…
Like You're not good enough for people or you don't deserve the things you achieve
Or even like you always need someone's help to love yourself
That's where the 3-step process comes in.